Congratulations to the Golden State Warriors!!

dear golden state warriors organization,

the biggest news in sports yesterday behind buehrle's no-hitter is that the you guys made the playoffs for the first time in 13 years by defeating the portland trailblazers. congratulations to all the players, coaching staff and hot cheerleaders. in fact, the last time was when nelson was coaching the warriors.

this is the guy sitting right above me. what a weird sign.

with the your high-powered, up-tempo offense, i believe that the warriors can compete with any team. that game in march against the suns showed that golden state does have the key ingredients to make a team work with shot blocker andres biedrens, one of the most underrated young talents in the league - monta ellis, and lastly one of the most exciting backcourts in the L, so i'm excited to see y'all in the playoffs. i took a photo and wrote down what baron was saying at that time. hope you don't mind.

that's my hand in the lower right hand corner. just wanted to show you and world proof i was there.

but sad to say, but a lot has changed since 1994. the nba playoffs are a bit different. so before you guys start getting too excited, let me explain to whom it may concern how the playoffs have changed since 1994.

10. we have a new president

it's no longer bill clinton. just so you guys know.

9. remind everyone to rotate their fantasy baseball players regularly

since you guys haven't been in the playoffs in so long, every april and may you're used to having all this time to maintain your fantasy squad. but now you have the playoffs on your mind. just a friendly reminder. or you can not tell your teammates and beat them every week. hehe go felix hernandez!!

8. arnold schwarzeneggar is the governor of california

well he'll be at at least two games at the oracle arena. so don't get too star struck. i think it's his duty being up in norcal attending these type of events.

7. there is a 3 point line

oh that's been there since the 1960's? silly me. sorry about that. of course you knew that. j-rich shoots like nineteen of them per game. don't i look foolish? me telling j-rich there's a 3 point line is like telling hiro to save the world.

6. the first round is a 7-game series

yes, this is a new one. the playoffs, especially the first round are longer. so if you thought that you might be able sneak by and get lucky with three quick games, remember you have to do it for a fourth. but beware, because...

5. players try harder in the playoffs

everybody tries hard for a hamburger.

a good comparison for the regular season is that it's like you or me going down to mcdonald's to get a hamburger versus the playoffs which is like a homeless person seeing a free big mac on the ground. we're just not going to get that burger unless we're hobos. but this means biedrins might not be able to get away with as much since people are going to be muscling their way around in the paint. and that baron might get injured in the first game. just to mentally and physically prepare your players. you might want to remind the coaching staff of that. you also might way to tell them that..

4. the talent level is higher now

look at that picture of nash. he's swimming in a sea of basketballs. hahaha

in 1994, the all-nba first team was john stockton, latrell sprewell, scottie pippen, karl malone, and hakeem olajuwon. times are a bit different. last year's all-nba first team was steve nash, kobe bryant, lebron james, dirk nowitzki and shaq. i'd say this team is a bit better. wouldn't you? as well as the league as a whole. you could make an argument that that team is really good, which they are. but if that 1994 all nba first team was transported into 2007 in a 7 game series, they wouldn't stand a chance because...

3. small ball doesn't work in the playoffs

oops. forgot to add speech bubbles. you get the picture though.

when you guys were last in the playoffs you remember teams like the bulls winning with out a legit big man. for goodness sakes they won the 'ship with bill cartwright and will perdue. stuff like that won't work in 2007. every championship team since the 1960's besides that bulls 'ship team has had a solid big man in the middle. and the bulls winning it is due to the fact that they A) had michael jordan and B) the nba kinda sucked back then. so you can get by with not having a big man in the regular season and i know nelly likes to run small with al harrington in the middle, but that won't work anymore....at least not in the playoffs. and especially now that...

2. the western conference is good

the east was where everything's at. key word - WAS. there was a long drought of good western teams, but the west has been good since the late 1990's. so if you get past the first round which is unlikely, then you will have to play the winner of the utah jazz/houston rockets series(which i think will be the rockets, and you guys don't have a chance against t-mac 'n' yao). but you shouldn't even be thinking about this unless you beat your first round opponents which are...

1. the dallas mavericks

the dallas mavericks your first round opponent are a bit different than you remember. well nelly can tell you. they aren't last in the league anymore. none of these players are on the team anymore. in fact i don't think any of those players are in the nba anymore. ACTUALLY, they have the best record in the regular season. ACTUALLY, they also have the front runner for mvp . ACTUALLY, they also picked up the dominant kevin willis.

so golden state warriors,

WELCOME TO THE PLAYOFFS!!!!



sincerely,
mat

random lookalike of the day!


lakers pg jordan farmar and mistah tumnus